A famous person once said ‘rugby is a good occasion for keeping 15 bullies from the centre of the city’  and that is what occurred this past Saturday for 3 hours and 60 odd people.  Fredericton was still recovering from the 80 person rugby pub crawl on Friday evening and touch would provide the city with a little bit of relief, like FEMA in New Orleans, from the rugger hoard.

The Port City Penguins in their traditional dress of t-shirt tuxedos were looking rebound from last week against an ever improving Free Agents team.   However with Cameron “Six Pack Abs” Ough back from wherever he was last week, I am guessing a cannibal convention, the offensive force which the Penguins are known for would be on fire.   The Free Agents did show some really good stuff at the start of the match with  Brennan “I don’t look like my brothers” Foley and Dunu “The Kiwi Cricketeer” moving the ball well.  Unfortunaly that wasn’t enough for Steve “Black Socks” Doucette who would score three and Cameron would touch down with 4 tries as the Penguins marched to a Morgan Freeman oscar winning performance of 12-3.

Next up, the highly anticipated match of the two undefeated teams, the Confederation Bridge Builders vs Geriatric Gentlemen.   The tension was so high that you could actually hear the hips crack and pop in the Has Beens’ corner.  The PEI boys must have ate a lot of boiled potatoes, scallop potatoes, fried potatoes, potato on a stick, baked potatoes because their energy level was through the roof or the Has Been’s didn’t get their nap and Metamusil in before the game.  Whatever the case,  the PEIers came out flying like a potatoe out of a gun with Mike “Easy There Shoes” Deighan putting up three tries and Dave “Look At You: Misenr and Jon “Saw Your Mother Last Night” Parkman putting in two.  Bryan “The Evil Son From Sin City” Ray tried to keep the game close with two tries of his own and Shawn of Amos and Andy fame put his first try ever on a nice run to the corner.  The PEIers would keep their undefeated record and the power of the potato going with a convincing 8-3 win over the osteoporosis candidates.

The ladies would take the floor next in a rematch of Week 1.  The Grey Bush of UNB would take on the Cunning Stunts.  This was a very fast and entertaining game to watch.  The ball was moving around the court like it was wacked up on speed.   In a back and forth game every inch counted.  Lindsay “Oki From Muskoki” Rose  seemed to weight only 20 pounds and she would disappear if she turned sideways which could only explain some of the small holes in the defence she was able to get through.   She would pop in 3 tries through the power of determination.  Her counter part Emily “Part Human Part Rubber” Corey would put down two for the Grey Bush as well.  The Cunning Stunts would see some good work by Kimmie “Downtown” Dymond and Kirby “Curbstomp” Morill.   Unfortunaly the try line could not be found for the Cunning Stunts and a score of 6-0 would result.

Next up, the Young Guns of UNB would be in touch against STU.   There two teams seem to match up evenly in every aspect.  The scoring would take a while to get going, not until the second part of the second half would tries begin to occur.  STU would start the scoring by a wonderful running line of Marissa “Wallsmasher” Walcott.  However, the Emy “Freundin” Ritchie would sneak a try in to keep the score tied.  It was then time for Alexa “The Axe” Thompson to throw her name into the scoring hat with a nice run up the middle to score for UNB.  Not to be out done, Hannah “The Dagger” Davies would do just that to UNB scoring a hard fought try.  She doesn’t get angry, she get stabby!!!  Unfortuanly the offense of UNB proved to much with Kailey “The Crusher” Neil putting in one and Emy “Reichstag” Ritchie ending the match with her second try.   Final score ending in 4-2 for the Young Guns.

Next up the Burt’s Allstars would take on the Kowalski Killers.  The match would start out as a back and forth contest with some good runs and D coming from both sides.  The Burt’s Allstars opened the scoring with Andrew “Grime-Time” Riemer slicing through and scoring a try.  Not to be outdone though Pat “Orchid Fetish” Price would score for the Killers on a good set of phases.  The BAs would pick up steam and hair gel to see them start rolling like rock stars.  Jazmin “Snoochi Snoochi” Kukavica would score 4 tries for the BAs but would be outdone by no other then Andrew “Grime-Time” Reimer who would touch down another 5 tries.   The final tally was 15-3 for the BAs. 

The last match of the night would see the Husky Heffers take on the Lavish Locks.  Unfortunatly, the loavable locks forgot their secret weapon…a bucket of KFC to distract the Baby Elephants and this would prove to be their downfall.  The Baby Elephants have been picking up steam and gas since the start of the league and on Saturday night would be rewarded for all their hard eating. Alex “Stinky Bum” Stewart would see the try line 3 times for the Petit Pachyderms.  Not to be outdone for the Lanky Locks, Blake “The Best There Is, The Best There Was and The Best There Ever Will Be” (no ego) Edwards would touch down for 2 tries along with Coleman “Lushious” Llyod scoring one in the corner and a nice little play.  The Burger King Beauties would see two others score two tries each on some good running up the middle with Iggy “The Wolverine” Bolisnikov and Hendrik “Autobaun” Haussien in the driver seat going 180km/h past the try line to the Guggenheim.  Final score 7-5 for the Baby Elephants.